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Why You Should Be Watching Arrow: A Highly Respectable If Loquacious List of ~Infallible Reasons~
So you should probably be watching Arrow on the CW if you can and you like shows with plot twists and slightly dark moments where your morality is questioned and you don't mind not watching with 100% brain matter.
If you're not watching Arrow or are and you know someone who should, below the cut is a well-written and respectable* guide as to why you should be watching Arrow.
*If by well-written and respectable you mean should be written in crayon or comic sans.
So let's begin!
This is OLIVER.
He is a QUEEN.
Wait. His name is Oliver Queen.
CLOSE ENOUGH.
He is a QUEEN.
Wait. His name is Oliver Queen.
CLOSE ENOUGH.
He can't really act but he wanders around a lot either shooting bad guys and being a bad ass vigilante, or walking around without a shirt. or doing ninja warrior stuff in his nightclub lair without a shirt. idk. gratuitous shirtlessness and bamfing. he has a ton of scars too. who needs character development.
by shooting I mean with arrows. lol the show is called arrow. he shoots people with arrows. oh it's also based on the green arrow but it's totally not because otherwise he'd be zooming around the countryside with the green lantern wearing a dodgy mustache and training the lantern about racism! and homophobia! and oh gosh Arrow still might do this. i wonder if they can get ryan reynolds for that.
by shooting I mean with arrows. lol the show is called arrow. he shoots people with arrows. oh it's also based on the green arrow but it's totally not because otherwise he'd be zooming around the countryside with the green lantern wearing a dodgy mustache and training the lantern about racism! and homophobia! and oh gosh Arrow still might do this. i wonder if they can get ryan reynolds for that.
anyway! plot, yawn. oliver has a list from his dad of people to get vengeance on who have FAILED STARLING CITY.
you failed starling city, bad guys.
you failed BIRDS feel bad, bad guys.
anyway oliver went missing for five years after his yacht (yeah everyone's rich) sank and he had to survive on a ~mysterious island~ (which is like. a drug island guarded secretly by the awesome kelly hu but we don't know that for sure but KELLY HU.)
you failed starling city, bad guys.
you failed BIRDS feel bad, bad guys.
anyway oliver went missing for five years after his yacht (yeah everyone's rich) sank and he had to survive on a ~mysterious island~ (which is like. a drug island guarded secretly by the awesome kelly hu but we don't know that for sure but KELLY HU.)
you can guard my island any time kelly hu
Oliver becomes a vigilante.
known as THE HOOD. 'cause he wears a hood.
subtle.
he puts green paint over his eyes too.
'cause that's going to hide who you are.
like the guys who put sharpie on their face and robbed a store in america.
paint over his eyes.
GENIUS DISGUISE.
This is Digg.
Occasionally shirtless but mostly in a suit. Starts off as a bodyguard. Ends up training with Oliver a lot.
Or giving pep talks while Oliver is busy being shirtless.
god man it's just the hottest ship ever. Oliver and Digg. DIGG IT.
This is Thea, Oliver's sister.
Nicknamed Speedy to make you think she's going to be the sidekick (who's called Speedy in the comics) but she just does drugs so maybe that's where it's from. When oliver "comes back from the dead", she Accidentally Folger's Commercial all over him (so for first ep it's like woah chemistry OH WAIT THEY'RE BROTHER AND SISTER? STOP LOOKING AT EACH OTHER LIKE THAT.)
Katie Cassidy is Laurel, Oliver's prerequisite boring love interest in a love triangle with Oliver's best friend. yawn. it's all going to go Spider-man on their asses anyway, can't even really be bothered at finding you a pic of Harry Osborn wait sorry Tommy Merlyn
I am more interested in Paul Blackthorne's character Quentin
'cause he's hot and he's Harry Dresden in disguise lol where's your skull Harry and he's an alcoholic and unhinged and crazy and
THE SHIP HAS THE BEST PORTMANTEAU SINCE STARK SPANGLED BANNER
because he's QUENTIN and the Hood is OLIVER
and together they're
QUIVER.
get it.
like arrows come in.
Arrow
hahahaha.
oh look who is also in arrow
he still can't act either in this. he can't act in anything. at least he gets a decent twist or two so far.
BARROWMAN!
every time I type that I hear david tennant saying it in my head
BARROWMAN!
also who is in it but COLIN SALMON
why are you not wearing sparkles and dancing with kristina, colin.
why are you in a dapper suit colin.
go and dance with kristina, colin.
also felicity
smoking hot it genius
(and oliver sometimes tries to smile but it looks like it hurts poor dear.)
....so this would be why I rarely try and convince people to watch shows.
but oh look
laurel and quentin are the cleverest people on tv!
YES.
WATCH ARROW RIGHT NOW OKAY.
WATCH ARROW RIGHT NOW OKAY.
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